The Gift

Yesterday was "shine a light on autism" calling for recognition of the autism epidemic (that's right, it is now officially an epidemic as it affects 1:88) in our country thanks to Autism Speaks.  The Bean in Chi Town was shining with blue light last night - how cool is that?  Merchandise Mart also displayed blue lights at the top of their building for several days. We are very grateful, but we've a long way to go.

It's been quite an adventure thus far.  I'm sure it will be full of even more jokes, drama, laughter, tears, bickering and frustration in the time to come.  You may be thinking that these characteristics are totally "normal" - whatever that means. This is our "normal" and I will be sharing our triumphs, challenges, frustration, pride and more in support of autism awareness and parents and families who often feel isolated and alone.  You're not alone!  I can't tell you how relieved I am to hear/see other's stories and know that these things happen to other people too!  Onto The Gift...........

We have known that Molly has Asperger's Syndrome just going on 2 years.  It's funny, I had always thought she had so many of the characteristics of Asperger's but all of the literature I read discounted having a sense of humor.  The descriptions were universal in stating that a sense of humor (due to the literal nature of their interactions) needed to be absent and Molly is FUNNY!  Unfortunately, this misnomer got in the way.  I will get into the way we presented her with the information down the road - I wouldn't want to bombard you with too much information all at once!  To make a long story short we knew that something was "off" and struggled to find an answer - I was so grateful when we finally had a diagnosis and could actually begin to help her. All of the things we have tried that have worked/not worked will also follow - I've a feeling I won't be running out of anything to share anytime soon!

Molly is often down on herself.  But amazingly she wakes up every morning happy to see the world and most importantly to go off to school.  It has taken her awhile to form a group of friends, but thankfully she has a really nice group and even goes into town with them on Friday's after school for ice cream or whatever the treat of the day is.  If asked what she would change about herself, surprisingly enough Asperger's does not come up, gluten intolerance is the key changeable offense.  I don't know many who have her natural ability to see the beauty where others see nothing.  She is kind, sweet, funny, quite possibly the most empathetic person I know and so smart!!  As with other Asperger's kids people have always been blown away by the early vocabulary (complete, intelligent sentences by 12 mos.).  She also has a natural affinity for math, taking HS algebra as a 6th grader - her homework is something I stay away from.

Early on after the diagnosis I sat down with my other two children and we had the conversation regarding home being your "safe" place.  We had always discussed this in other aspects, but it was important to let them know that their sister may be feeling a bit out of sorts and there is of course the "label" factor.  It was actually several months before I heard my son taunting her and telling her she was reacting a certain way because she had ass-burgers (note: he is not a mean child, they push each others buttons like crazy).  She looked right at him and said "My Asperger's is a gift isn't it mom?!" with a proud unwavering knowledge as she has heard me tell her this repeatedly.  I do believe Asperger's is a gift.  Molly has taught me to look at things differently.  I see the beauty in things I never would have noticed before.  I thought I had patience before, but now I have it tenfold.  Don't get me wrong, there are of course days when I want to rip my hair out and yell at the top of my lungs due to frustration or temper tantrum, but those days only make me appreciate the good ones all the more.  Comments are welcome as well as any questions you may have.  I will be posting weekly and would be more than happy to share any information I have or forward you on to a resource that I find invaluable.  All of these will reveal themselves in upcoming posts.  Thanks for reading!